Erica Marx Erica Marx Coaching

Status mingle

by for . Last edit was 10 months ago
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Start with eye contact instructions (2 groups) & mingle
switch roles & mingle
choose and change status
Explore external vs. internal

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understand how body language communicates connection, relationships
give access to adjust internal status
confidence for networking, public speaking


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  • playing cards


Introduce status: This status exercise is not money, class, etc. This is about how we carry our bodies through the world

2 groups -- each on one side of the room

1 - avoid eye contact

"Look, Look away, Look, Look away"
Look, then look away,
Then look again to check to see if they are still there
Look away second time, quickly (darting) 

10 - hold eye contact for an uncomfortably long period of time

Ask group for a hobby. ie. "Knitting" -- Choose a hobby everyone knows about.
Great! This is the monthly get-together of the knitting clu
b. It's an exciting meeting because you've just started the fundraising drive (or whatever).

1 & 10 Mingle: With 1's and 10's as assigned

10 & 1 Mingle: Switch roles and mingle again

Derief: What did you notice?
All the other body postures, motions, etc come out just from the eyes
SLIDE-- show scale, discuss extremes. 

Choice Mingle with Status Slide - Pick a number you want to explore (2 min) ring bell, the you can slide to adjust to others (mirror). At second bell note what status number you ended on.
Line up silently based on internal status number you chose at the start
Line up silently based on the ending number 

lesson - you can adjust your dial

"Status is not about WHO is in the room.It's about who YOU are in the room."

For speaking: Match the room to minimize status gap, create connection.
EYES MATTER (lead to eye contact games)


External status:
Deal 1 card: Cards of forehead (others see, participant does not see)
Line up silently based on external status
How did you know you were a 2?
You are always being told what others think of your status. Social cues. To some extent can not change. However... 

External + Internal 

Deal 2 cards: 1 Card on forehead (unknown to participant) + Inner status (known only to participant)
Line up silently based on external status
Line up silently based on internal status

What combinations were in the group? How did you reconcile the status gaps? How did you know other's internal status? 

Think about your internal number going into a situation. Do you want to adjust it? What can you do to dial your number up or down?


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